Learning from the Past; Building Health for the Future

Age has a way of blurring your vision. You need longer arms for the fine print and regulated “daytime hours” for the road. We laugh at “cheater glasses” that have become wardrobe and scramble for one of 20 pairs when it’s time to read the medicine bottle. 

We can see an eye doctor and seek eye health, but often there is an “in between time” when the need and “not quite ready yet” are still trying to align. The sensible, most healthy solution is to look into what is going on and have someone who understands the intricacy of the eye do an evaluation. 

The same is true with the pain in our lives. We can muscle through a trigger, lose another night of sleep from stress, and avoid certain relationships so we don’t have to “deal with the issue.” But what can bring ultimate healing and health to the brokenness in our lives is an honest look back at what is causing the pain we feel.

It’s important to look at the whole of your life, both the good and the hard to see if there are patterns that have developed that are unhealthy and hurting you. This is not an easy process, but recognizing our tendencies in the events in our lives can give us a greater picture of what we need to do to build safe and healthy patterns.

It also helps us to see that all of our life has not been bad; good and bad are intermingled in every person’s life. Reading through the book of Psalms and watching the ups and downs of David’s life shows us a picture of the rhythm of highs and lows found in every life. 

As we look back it is most valuable to not just point a finger at others who have hurt you. In a lot of trauma those fingers can point steadily at another person and blame can be cast. But the most healthy lens to use is a prayerful ask for the Lord to reveal patterns. 

Do I migrate towards people who hurt me? Do I speak up for myself? Do I seek counsel in my decision making or simply jump to the next thing? Even in hard relationships where betrayal or abuse has happened, we have to take a look at all that surrounds those events as well. As we identify ways we can walk in greater wholeness, healthy patterns can follow.

• Building healthy patterns begins by recognizing unhealthy patterns in you and others.
• Building healthy patterns may take wise counsel and honest mentors.
• Building healthy patterns will take a willingness to be vulnerable and desire to grow.
• Building healthy patterns are built on the guidelines of Scripture for the greatest healing.

Don’t be afraid to look back and learn from the past. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.” Proverbs 3:5-6  Allow God to open your eyes to a greater understanding of how to live in a more healthy manner. 

NEXT STEPS:

1. Pray and ask the Lord to help you look back with honesty and a willingness to learn.
2. Set aside time to evaluate your life incrementally to find both strengths and weaknesses in your responses and activities and unhealthy patterns in the people who surround you.
3. Don’t beat yourself up. Keep growth and healthy choices at the forefront of your mind. 
4. This takes time and honesty. It also may take a mentor/counselor to walk you through to clear thinking and choices. Be willing to engage with someone who understands mental health and applies Biblical knowledge to the healing process. 
5. Understand this takes time and prioritizing healthy growth. Be patient and intentional as you process and fight for healing.